I am outraged. This site, which I just went through a fair amount of hassle to customize, is now popping up after the Wikipedia page for a soccer player who happens to share my name. (No, I won’t be linking to that.)

I guess that would be okay if this guy were Abby Wambach, captain of a team that’s about to head to the World Cup. But he’s not. He’s “Mark Schulte,” random soccer guy you’ve never heard of. Nobody’s updating his page and he’s not even on a professional roster at this point.

Yet Google’s pretty sure you’re looking for him, not me. I’m insulted. Watch out Mark Schulte, I’m gunning for you!